Sandra Coke

The capital defense community has lost a valued and beloved member, Sandra Coke.  This is, "A Statement from the Family of Sandra Coke."

The Coke family is devastated by the loss of our beloved Sandra. She was a loving mother, daughter, sister and auntie, and a shining light in our family; her good cheer, easy laugh and generous hugs will be missed. Those of us who were privileged to know Sandra will remember her as an unusually kind, generous and big-hearted person. She passionately devoted her professional life to helping the poor and those who endured difficult childhoods. All of us will miss Sandra’s beautiful, giving spirit.

We want to express our deepest thanks to the hundreds of caring people in local, state and federal law enforcement, current and former colleagues, friends, and members of the public and the media — who labored day and night to assist with the search for Sandra. Your care and expressions of concern have been humbling.

We are so grateful to each of you for your kindness and support during this most difficult time.

We also want to thank the wonderful friends and colleagues who have created the Sandra Coke Fund to provide for her daughter’s care and education.

Our family and Sandra’s daughter will need time and privacy to mourn our loss. We thank you for understanding our need for privacy at this time.

Thank you again for all of your support in bringing home our beloved Sandra.

"Friends and Colleagues Launch 'The Sandra Coke Fund',”.

Sandra Coke enriched the lives of countless people who were fortunate to have crossed personal, professional, and spiritual paths with her.  An advocate, a leader, and a friend, Sandra helped us all see the world for what it is while working in pursuit of a brighter vision for what it ought to be. Calls and emails flooding in over the past week make it clear: Sandra inspired us all.

We lost Sandra in a senseless, devastating way.  It’s a loss that has shaken hundreds of people who were touched by this smart, compassionate and dedicated woman.

“Sandra worked hard but she never forgot the importance of having fun. She had the joyful spirit of a child all her life, and she brought that joyful spirit into her parenting and into all her friendships. She was rich in her generosity to her friends, family and those in need,” said a longtime friend.

Today, we are launching The Sandra Coke Fund (http://sandracokefund.org) to provide for the education and care of her teenage daughter.

“We hope you will join us in celebrating Sandra's courageous spirit and fierce commitment to her family, friends and community by continuing to support the most beautiful, most joyful part of her life -- her equally courageous daughter,” said a colleague of 20 years.

We do not consider this a charity; we consider it:

• An opportunity to support a woman who inspired us.
• An opportunity to ensure Sandra’s daughter continues to benefit from the example her mom lived every day.
• An opportunity to live up to the example Sandra set for us.
• An opportunity to join with people nationwide and create a lasting benefit from the grief we all share.

“Sandra was the warmest, most good natured friend I had. She was one of the few friends that would truly sacrifice for me. I could call her when I was too proud to call anyone else, tell her what I needed, and she would help me out if she could. To me, she was the quintessential ‘good mother.’ She saw the good in everyone, even when you couldn't see it in yourself,” added another longtime friend.

Please take a moment to think about Sandra, to smile and share your memories of her, finally to find your "inner Sandra" give as generously as you can to her daughter's fund at http://sandracokefund.org

The Sandra Coke Fund is fiscally sponsored by the Community Resource Initiative, a 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization so donations to the fund are tax-deductible to the extent provided by law.

Thank you,
Friends and Colleagues of Sandra Coke

News coverage includes:

"Slain woman identified as Sandra Coke," by Henry K. Lee in the San Francisco Chronicle.

The Los Angeles Times reports, "Sex offender 'person of interest' in federal investigator's death," by Lee Romney and Paige St. John.

"Sandra Coke: Body Identified as Missing California Federal Investigator," by Alexis Shaw and Rachel Katz for ABC News.

Update:  "This time, death penalty attorney knows the victim," is an OpEd by Andrew Love in the September 15 issue of the San Francisco Chronicle.  He is a former death penalty lawyer.

One of our own - someone from my professional family - had been killed by one of those people we have long defended. Killed by someone who, in any other circumstance, I would have warded off others' attempts to demonize. "You can't define someone by the worst thing they have ever done," I would say.

It isn't that I don't still believe those things. I do.

But that doesn't matter now.

The perpetrator has receded into the background. I don't care about his history or life struggles, his impairments or his vulnerabilities. I don't feel anger or hatred. I don't have feelings of vengeance. I don't want him dead. I don't feel anything for him at all.

This isn't about him.

This is about the horror, shock, pain and overwhelming sadness at the loss of a remarkable person. For the first time in 25 years, my focus has shifted from perpetrator to victim.